if only life was this simple

In a world of crime, drugs and anti social behaviour wouldn't it be nice if this is all we had to worry about:

Golf club members can untuck shirts at the 19th

Golfers at a club in Somerset can now wear their shirts outside their trousers.Wells Golf Club, which was established in 1893, had a strict dress code on and off the course until more youthful members objected to being told to tuck their shirts in.
They became so fed up with being unable to wear their shirts outside their trousers, they called an extraordinary vote on the issue.
The Times says to the horror of some older members the vote was passed by 40 votes to 20. The motion to untuck shirts at Wells Golf Club was proposed by Phil Slater, a 54-year-old businessman.
He said: "The fact that we want to untuck our shirts in the clubhouse will not lead to a slipping of standards. We just wanted to move with the times and be a bit more fashionable."
Club chairman Richard Birch said those against the idea believed untucked shirts look scruffy and would lead to a dropping of standards.
He added: "The younger players argued that their shirts are often very expensive and meant to be worn on the outside and that it would not make any difference to their behaviour or appearance.
"As soon as the vote was passed a few people immediately pulled their shirts out."

Can you spot the difference?

Here's one for all those afficiandos out there sent to me by Steve W. how good are you at this apptitude test CLICK HERE to find out. My score was 15, please post your scores in the comment box and I'll bet the girls will win.

Life's just not fair

Some people just get all the luck, have a look at this pic and you tell me if there hasn't been a bit of touching up somewhere!

How daft is this?

The Home office has announce it's latest course in reducing petty crime, specifically shoplifting. From now on anyone caught shoplifting will receive an on the spot £80 fine. er - if they could afford £80 they probably wouldn't be shoplifting in the first place.

And another thing, I have seen the trailers on TV for the New Thunderbirds movie and this reminded me of a question I have wanted to know the answer to since I was 10 years old: If International Rescue is a secret organisation in a secret location, who built Tracey Island? and who built thunderbirds 1-5. I can't imagine they just rang up an aircraft manufacturer and asked them to build 5 crafts to these designs our resident boffin has drawn up, don't worry we'll collect them and here's a check for 100 billion dollars, er don't tell anyone will you.

And I doubt Tracey island was built by the Greeks - it still wouldn't be finished.

Well Done RT

Congrats must go to Hungerford Round Table for organising a superb Carnival on Saturday, the sun shone and the crowds turned out and I haven't seen so many floats and entries since the last one I organised 12 years ago -haha! It's good to see the carnival back in RT's control and I beleive Jim S. deserves a pat on the back for that.

Golfing Matters

Well a great finish to the Open, I always find it exciting when there's a play off even though it was between a South African and a Yank, however congrats must go to Todd Hamiliton as the underdog to win the Claret jug, he kept his nerves perfectly.
I too had somewhat of decent round on Saturday morning especially on the 18th in front of the club house when I chipped out of the rough from 60 yds out hitting the centre of the green and the ball rolling straight in the hole for a birdie 3. What really made this moment was the fact there were 21 members of a society having coffee on the patio and all saw the shot. I bowed to tumultus aplause acknowleding the gallery,thrusting my arm in the air as if I'd just won the open. Actually I had only just played to my handicap and was beaten by my partners, but no one saw all the crap shots!

Local Comment - Marina

I note that The GOSE has upheld West Berks decision over the Marina project and does not have any objections, my views on this subject are known on this blog so I won't go on any further. However, locally most of you are aware of my own project and the opposition I am getting from Billy nomates, this news is really going to piss him off which will make him all the more determined to make my life difficult, so please support where you can via the web site. I will not publish the website address here as I do not wish undesirables to view this, at least until after the consultation period.but if you have not had an email please let me know.

The Open

The Open started this morning at Royal Troon with Rich Beem out in front with 5 under by the Ninth. A great opportunity for Ernie Els to show Tiger Woods that he is indeed now the World's No1 player.
As always Good luck to Nick Faldo I've got a Fiver on him- well you never know miricales can happen. Click here or on the banner for the live leader board.

This is an absolute classic

Man blasted testicles with shotgun

A 28-year-old man who shot himself in the testicles with a sawn-off shotgun has been jailed for five years.
David Walker had drunk 15 pints of lager when he accidentally discharged the gun which was stuffed down his trousers, Sheffield Crown Court heard.
The court was told how Walker underwent emergency surgery following the incident in Dinnington, South Yorkshire, and tests are continuing to find out how it will affect his fertility and future "sexual relationships".
A judge heard how he went home for the gun after spending an evening in the pub arguing with lifelong friend Stuart Simpson about whose turn it was to buy a beer.
Andrew Hatton, prosecuting, told the court Walker left the pub and returned later with the shotgun but the bar had closed by this time and Mr Simpson had left.
Mr Hatton said: "He went home to get his gun. As he was returning to the area of the pub with it the gun went off.
"He had it shoved down his trousers. After the shotgun had discharged he placed it in a rubbish bin and crawled back to his home address."
Walker told police he was so drunk he had no idea how he managed to shoot himself and why he went to fetch it.
Mr Hatton said the defendant's mother found him at home covered with blood in the groin area.
It was a doctor at Bassetlaw Hospital, in Worksop, who called in the police.

Ouch! it Burns Mummy

What next -All Blacks walk on Water? The Kiwis are obviously prepared to try anything to conjure up super human feets(sic) no doubt in training for next year's British Lions Tour (hopefully with Martin Johnson) if the following story is anything to go by:

Ananova: Twenty-eight people have been treated for burns during a fire-walking event in New Zealand.
Eleven of the 28 were taken to hospital in Dunedin where they were treated for superficial burns and blistering.
They were among 341 people who thought they were creating a new world record for fire-walking, but a spokeswoman for Guinness said the fire-walking record is judged on distance, and not on numbers taking part.
Festival director Emma Ramsay Brown said: "We certainly didn't want to cause any pain for people". Didn't anyone ever point out to them - hot coals burn!
They'll need to be harder than that when the Lions come

Wet (from the inside) weekend

Most excellent day on Saturday as 8 of us spent 12 hours at the Marlborough Jazz & Blues festival (click for line up)Each band was at a different venue, mostly pubs and Marquees, but as it was necessary to keep out of the rain and on the move,(so as to see as many performers as possible)wherever we took refuge there seemed to be a bar, so advantage was taken at every opportunity. Needless to say by the time we got to see Gino Washington at the final event I was positively awash with Guinness and London Pride.
All the performances we saw fantastic (especially Sticky wicket)and you'd need a week to see the all, but I take my hat off to the organizers of the festival as it is an amazing experience - shame about the weather.
Similarly Shalbourne village beer and blues festival (held on the same day) went superbly according to my son who attended even though he'd never heard of any of the acts (The Troggs topped the bill)Lets hope next year it's not the same weekend as Marlborough. However, son camped at the festival site in the mud and has now declared he's wants to get a union flag coloured tent - to take to Glastonbury next year!

Well what goes around.............

One of the reasons I have not been posting so often recently is, in between working, I have been researching my family history. Over the last three weeks I have got back to my Great, great,great,great Grandfather born in Penzance in 1751, and have been able to identify all offspring and marriages since then. This has been entirely possible due to a relative I didn't know existed. It turns out that there is a mirror branch of my paternal family in Australia and have been able to be in touch via email with my direct cousin. My grandfather had a cousin who emigrated to OZ in 1889, and it's been thanks to my cousin's wife who had done the research from their side that I've been able to fill in the blanks.
If anyone is considering researching their family tree - believe me it's time consuming and obsessive. I've only done one side of my paternal grand parents. There are three others to go, but I've found some good links on the net to get started so if anyone wants any hints then contact me.
Anyway I'm now going to have to reconsider my stance regarding the Australians and Rugby - it's bad enough being born in Wales.

Will they never forget

My friend Bob is currently down under on business and on arrival in OZ was confronted with this. It seems that they still take it personally

Would anyone notice?

Ananova: Beckhams replaced by performing seals

David and Victoria Beckham were replaced by performing seals when they stood up one of the biggest names on American TV. They gave up a joint interview on the Jay Leno show, preferring to stay on holiday in Marrakesh, reports the Evening Standard.
Network chiefs hastily issued a new schedule, replacing the couple with a display of performing animals from the SeaWorld theme park.

Probably a good choice for replacements, I doubt whether anyone noticed except I'll bet Jay Leno got more understandable and abstract conversations from the Seals than he would have from the Beckhams.

Is there any hope?

Sorry for the lack of postings this week, I am very busy at he moment but will post when I can.
I could not let this go without comment. I read yesterday that upto 50% of state schools are to cut sports days or a least the content of them ie. Track and field events. The nanny states this encourages competitiveness which should be avoided to spare the disappointment of the losers. We are becoming a nation of sporting losers (although we did win a one day test against the West Indies yesterday). We complain that we only have one hope in Henman at Wimbledon, is it any wonder when we have no other up and coming sports men/women to follow him. When our current hopefuls in the Olympics such as Paula Radcliffe retire, who is going to take their place?
Sport should be encouraged at the earliest stage and competetiveness applauded. Without a winning instinct how on earth is any competitor going to succeed in their chosen sport?