This is an absolute classic

Man blasted testicles with shotgun

A 28-year-old man who shot himself in the testicles with a sawn-off shotgun has been jailed for five years.
David Walker had drunk 15 pints of lager when he accidentally discharged the gun which was stuffed down his trousers, Sheffield Crown Court heard.
The court was told how Walker underwent emergency surgery following the incident in Dinnington, South Yorkshire, and tests are continuing to find out how it will affect his fertility and future "sexual relationships".
A judge heard how he went home for the gun after spending an evening in the pub arguing with lifelong friend Stuart Simpson about whose turn it was to buy a beer.
Andrew Hatton, prosecuting, told the court Walker left the pub and returned later with the shotgun but the bar had closed by this time and Mr Simpson had left.
Mr Hatton said: "He went home to get his gun. As he was returning to the area of the pub with it the gun went off.
"He had it shoved down his trousers. After the shotgun had discharged he placed it in a rubbish bin and crawled back to his home address."
Walker told police he was so drunk he had no idea how he managed to shoot himself and why he went to fetch it.
Mr Hatton said the defendant's mother found him at home covered with blood in the groin area.
It was a doctor at Bassetlaw Hospital, in Worksop, who called in the police.